2 Years Ago

It’s been two years since mom has passed and in these two years, it’s been a roller coaster. So many emotions, so many tears, and so many adventures. My husband has been amazing helping me in dealing with massive breakdowns and the massive mood swings. Not long ago I had the worst breakdown I’ve ever had.

This New Year’s Eve I decided to leave the past in the past. All the pain, all the suffering, all the negativity. I spent it with people who mean the most to me. And yes, I drank. A lot. I realized I’m not as young as I use to be lol. I came in the new year with a new attitude. That also goes with today.

Last night I had an amazing dream about mom. She was young, she was happy, smiling, and she was playing with her dog, Sam. Sam was a poodle mix that she loved dearly. He passes away not long after I was born, but there are tons of pictures that she had of him. I knew it was him. Mom was full of life. She always gave all of herself in whatever it was. She was active in church, helped with so many things, and was mom to all my friends. If you were a friend of mine, you were adopted. When I met my husband, she loved him before they met. She would give you her last dollar if it meant you were going to be ok.

She taught me so much about cooking, baking, sewing, and how to be a lady. This photo is one of my dad’s favorites. Mine too really. This is how she should be remembered. Her smile that was infectious. Her hugs that were genuine. She was my mom, grandma to my son, a sister, an aunt, a cousin, a friend, and a wife. And with each title she embraced it fully. There are days where I really miss her but I saw something that helped me. From the time she has been gone, she has been helping prepare my place in heaven with our Almighty God. Can you imagine how great it’s going to be?

Judy Nell Gill, April 18, 1946-January 5, 2018

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